Just a brief visit this time, as she has work commitments today and tomorrow.
It’s hard to believe we’ve known each other for over thirty years.
In fact, we were discussing tonight where we have chosen to live: she in Melbourne, me in Sydney.
“I’ve been here over fifteen years”, I told her, adding, “I’ve almost lived in Sydney longer than Lismore” (my home town).
For Sue, she’s been in Melbourne “longer than any other place I’ve lived”, she added.
It’s a strange state of affairs, in some ways.
We’re both from the country and the “country” makes up an important part of our identities and yet, we’ve both been living in the city (different cities) for many years, and we’ve both become “city folk” in lots of ways.
Sue is in Sydney for work today and tomorrow, and is staying with me tonight. I’m going to Melbourne in a few weeks time for work and will stay with her also. At last we have this great symmetry in our working lives that involves regular visits to the others’ city.
Tonight we had a bite to eat at nearby Il Bareto, a great little Italian place. Sue had the home made gnocchi, I had the pressed veal. Great food.
And then we came home ate chocolate, chatted, and eventually watched “60 minute makeover”. Although I’d heard about it, I’ve never seen it before.
As the name implies, it’s a house renovation program done in the space of sixty minutes.
Tonight’s program was a renovation for a couple of gay guys who loved karaoke and show tunes. Groan.
As Yani from Yaniism noted on Twitter it was the “best. worst. episode. ever”.
Conscious that I sometimes share material on other platforms that never makes “the cut” here on my blog, I will start sharing a few bits and pieces here also. These are the tweets, posts, and observations that still seem relevant at the end of each month. Lots of ephemera, but hopefully still quite entertaining.
March 3 : So it’s been a tough year, but we’re still putting up your premiums, and taking away the benefits we gave you.March 6 : What a terrific night.
March 8 : I know everyone’s talking about the English royal family, but how cool is the next Queen of Sweden, appearing at the GayGala in 2013, to the strains of Dancing Queen, announcing the Homo/Bi/Trans for the year.March 10 : In 1994 members of the Wagga Gay and Lesbian community marched in Mardi Gras. Fearful of being identified, many wore masks of Michael McCormack, the local newspaper editor who had written homophobic editorials. Cleaning out some old files, a friend found an original mask.
March 14 : Checking Mark Macgowan’s page on Wikipedia, and interested to read he was born in Newcastle raised in Casino, going to primary school and high school. Checking in with my cousins to see if they went to school with him.
March 14 : Pleased this song has made it through as Sweden’s entry for Eurovision this year. Good song. Good performance.
March 14 : You know what really annoys me? (on a Sunday night) People who say, “Sorry, I never read emails” or “I never check voice mails” or “Oh no, I never answer calls I don’t know” etc etc. I could go on. How on earth do you do your job as a journalist?
March 16 : I work in the media, and for the most part LinkedIn offers me planning jobs in the media, but occasionally they get it wrong. eg: Transport for NSW.March 17 : What’s with all the “comfortable underwear for men” ads on Fox Sports?Hardly an ad break without one. I get them on Facebook too. Maybe it’s just me?March 21 : Whenever there’s flooding in Sydney, I get worried phone calls from my family. I have to remind them I live in Surry HILLS now, not South Lismore. As much as I’m a proud “Southie” my retirement plans don’t include living there.
March 21 : Talkback Radio Tip #1 : Callers: If you’re driving, pull over, and pick up the phone. Producers? Don’t put them to air unless they do. Sometimes there’s “context” but generally hands-free driving calls sound like shit, and people can’t understand what they’re saying.
March 30 : After the closure of the print edition of my hometown (Lismore) newspaper, The Northern Star, there’s further integration with The Daily Telegraph. I assume this is happening with other regional newspapers too? It seems to be heading in a particular direction?
“I thought the Swedes were so hip and cool”, a number of friends and colleagues have said to me, when I’ve told them about a fairly dark past, about how Swedes treated Indigenous people there, the Sami. With a number of parallels to what happened in Australia and many other countries, it’s a very sad story.
The film “Sami Blood” (Sameblood) goes some way to helping people better understand the historical context. Told through the lens of one woman’s story, you get an insight into the personal, as well as the political reasons, why so many people became isolated from Sami culture. The film tells the story of a woman returning to Northern Sweden for the funeral of her sister. And while the returning sister claims to have nothing to do with her Indigenous heritage, the funeral rites for the sister remain firmly in the Sami tradition. The film then takes us back to why the returning sister chose to deny that part of her heritage. By the film’s end, there’s a resolution. It’s a beautiful film, and one I’d highly recommend.
It’s just one of two films I’ve seen, so far, at the Scandinavian Film Festival.
The other was called “Tom Of Finland”, tells the story of 1980s/1990’s popular culture artist. As with Sami Blood, the film starts in the 1940s, when the real life Tom was in the Finnish army, fighting the Soviet Union. The film then runs through the next thirty or forty years, as the real life Tom experiences the life of being a gay man, living in what appears to be a deeply conservative Finland. Until, finally, his art work, with its deep homoeroticism is discovered in America, becomes part of the popular culture, and perhaps influences a whole generation of “leather men”. It’s fascinating.
Even a week later, I’m still raving about the these two films. There’s another film I’m thinking of heading along to. The next couple of weeks are busy, so I’ll see how it all goes.
I had one of those moments tonight where I had goosebumps at a live performance. I was watching the Swedish band, First Aid Kit, play their first-ever gig in Sydney.
They’re two young women who play indie/folk/blah blah blah kind of music. They did a modern-day cover version of the song, “Universal Soldier” by Donovan as their encore. And rather than stay on the stage, they came into the audience.
“Could you please make a circle for us?”, one of them asked. And the obliging crowd did so almost immediately. Looking at the audience near the front, there were quite a few obvious Swedes watching the show. Lots of blonde hair. Perhaps this wasn’t so unusual for the Swedes, but for the Australians watching it was very unexpected, as First Aid Kit came right down into the audience for their encore. The song was modernised with references to Iraq and the Middle East, and I was truly moved.
I would review more of the show, except I hadn’t seen all that much. It was a day of travel from Hobart to Sydney. At the end of about three days of almost constant chatter, I went for a walk around the water in Hobart at lunchtime today. Although in the background there was a slight traffic rumble, the only sound which stood out was the sound of seagulls.
I’ve been in Hobart for an ABC conference, which I helped organise. The forums and awards part was twenty-four hours of constant chatter. Talking to friends and colleagues about matters both important and trivial from lunchtime yesterday through to lunchtime today, including a reasonably late night last night.
I hasten to add the chatter was always stimulating, and I was never once bored. But there’s something about talking and listening so much which can also be so incredibly exhausting.
Mid-afternoon with a couple of hours to kill until our plane back to Sydney, I found a comfortable lounge in a quiet spot in a quiet room away from everyone else and had a 20-minute nap. Or perhaps “meditation” is a better word to describe that brief moment where you close your eyes, close your mind off to the world, and try to get a little bit of equilibrium back. As we waited at the airport, I chatted with some of my former colleagues from Western Australia: three women who I genuinely like as people as well as colleagues.
Upon arriving home, I had a brief couple of hours at home on the couch before heading off to the Oxford Art Factory. As I arrived at Oxford Street I was amazed by the length of the queue waiting to get into the Oxford Art Factory, as it spread right up to the nearby traffic lights. I was further amazed by the conversations of those in front and behind me. Mostly “emos”, they spent a lot of time talking about their sex lives, and the “bitches” they had slept with. It was a little too much for a bloke like myself. Closer to the front of the queue, I began to wonder if I’d joined the right queue. As I arrived at the door and secured a wristband to what was apparently an “emo” club I realised I’d joined the wrong queue. “Shit”, I thought to myself. The giveaway for me was when the security bloke swiped me for drugs – ala the airport – assuming the only reason I’d be in this queue was to sell drugs to the emos!!
First Aid Kit plays Oxford Art Factory, Sydney
Thankfully, I made my way into the Oxford Art Factory and caught the last few tunes by First Aid Kit. Finally, the Swedes out-numbered the emos, and for that, I was truly grateful. And I was pleased to see a fabulous band play a few songs. I’m left wanting more.
For the last seven days, I’ve been trying desperately to update my blog. As always, I’ve written a blog entry every day (as is my want); I just haven’t been able to complete and publish any of them them. Tonight’s there’s a bunch of entries which I’m going to re-visit, and they may just appear over the next few hours.
There’s a bunch of entries about everything from my social life to locking myself out of the house again. Yes, really.
Although this blog is not the kind of place where I reveal the intimate nature of my existence – as I blog under my “real name” that’s something I don’t want to do – I do use this as a means of tracking my life for those negative patterns which sometimes emerge. I’ve also found it’s a good way for me to think through some of the things in my life which cause me concern, and thus hopefully find a more positive way forward. When I’m grumpy or depressed, for example, it’s my hope a bit of personal creativity might help me break the cycle of negativity.
For others, I’m hoping the food, the wine, the travel, and the occasional insight into a slightly crazy character is also vaguely entertaining.
And that’s the problem. Just about everything I’ve written over the last week has been dead boring.
Maybe it’s just a bit of “writers block” – trying to find the right words – or perhaps, more likely, there’s something deeper going on? Maybe it’s not the words? Maybe it’s just that my life is a bit boring right now.
“I’m in a bit of a rut at the moment”, I’ve told a few friends over the last few days. Although I’m feeling well and truly satisfied in my professional life at the moment, I’m feeling less satisfied with other parts of my life. I’m going through that “I wish I had a partner” phase of my life once again without necessarily having the will or desire to do anything about it. I’m also going through that, “what does the rest of my life hold for me?” kind of feelings.
Part of me thinks it’s because I went to the financial advisor a few weeks ago and started talking about things like retirement, and have also made an appointment about my will. I’m not so concerned about the financial things, more about the life plan. We talked, for example, about my desire to move home to Lismore at some point. I’ve also got a fairly vague desire to live in Sweden at some point. At age forty-five, I’m wondering if those really are my short and long-term desires.
The last time I felt this way I booked an overseas holiday and went travelling for three months. Part of me thinks this would be a good strategy again. Part of me thinks I should just grow up a bit and try to find more comfort in my own skin.
Who said I don’t use this blog for a degree of self-revelation?
Maybe I’ll feel better after a few days in Lismore over Easter?
In the meantime, it’s a full-moon and I have no plans to leave the house…
Peter Joback and Eva Dahlgren played Stockholm in 2008
In order from least time spent to most time spent, it’s been an evening of house cleaning, television watching, and travel research. My goal tonight was to find out a little more about Nyköping, a town of about 35,000 people about an hour by train from Stockholm.
I’m spending a night there to see a concert by Peter Jöback and Cookies ‘n’ Beans. Peter does everything from show tunes to pop to heart-felt ballads, while Cookies ‘n’ Beans are country and blue-grass inspired.
I like them both very much. And this was the closest venue to Stockholm I could find them playing while I’m there.
And what a venue, as I’ve discovered tonight: an old castle dating back to the twelfth century called Nyköpingshus. Just to make sure I hadn’t misread the ticket, I’ve found a few concerts on Youtube which have been conducted there, and it looks like a really nice intimate venue. I’m in the fifth row on the left hand-side. Hopefully there’ll be interesting people on either side to chat to before the show and during intermission.
I had planned to catch the train back that night, but my friend Graeme mentioned the trains back to Stockholm stop at 9.30, so I’ve been online tonight trying to find some suitable accommodation.
I looked at four different places to stay. The first, the Railway Hostel had one room apartments right next to the railway station at very cheap prices. Another, called Forty Towers had some appeal purely for the comic value of the hotel’s name. But the real choice came down to The Scandic and The Clarion, both offering rooms at about the same price which, on current exchange rates, was about $120 per night including breakfast. Thanks to the wonders of Tripadvisor and Google Maps, I was able to read other people’s reviews and then have a good close look at the street, the location, walking distance etc thanks to Street View. How did we cope in the old days? In the end, I’ve gone with The Clarion as it seems to have nicer interiors and exteriors and the price also includes breakfast AND a light evening buffet. It’s also quite close to the stream which flows through the town, and which I’ll need to cross to attend the concert.
The hotel has its origin from ‘Nordiska Kompaniet’ which was one of Sweden’s most known furniture manufactories and which was located on the premises from the beginning of the 20th century until the 1970’s. The location of the hotel is perfect, right next to the harbour and with only 5 minutes walk to the city centre. When the weather allows you can enjoy your breakfast or dinner buffet on our beautiful veranda, right by the river. Feel like home away from home with complimentary dinner buffet, breakfast buffet, afternoon coffee or tea, recreation area with sauna and jacuzzi.
The town looks quite “historic” with lots of castles in the nearby areas, lots of old buildings and so on. And as I went on Google Street View tonight, I discovered it also has lots of narrowish streets which generally makes for an interesting places to wander about. There’s a mid-afternoon tour of the castle (in English) on the day I arrive, so I reckon I’ll take that in too.
The other thing which looks really fantastic is Stendörren, a nearby archipelago where the islands are linked by little bridges. There’s some great photos on Flickr.
Even though I’ve visited Stockholm twice before, I haven’t visited all of the obvious tourist attractions. One notable omission has been home/gallery/museum of Prins Eugins Waldemasudde, located on Djurgården.
I don’t know why I haven’t been there before. Maybe I figured it was just going to a bit of a boring old house, and there was too much else to see in Stockholm in the middle of summer? If so, I was completely wrong.
The house itself is completely charming. Prins Eugins obviously had an eye for good design, as the house enjoys wonderful views and seems completely in touch with its environment. It’s very much an open, airy kind of space.
Outside also, there are lots of wonderful places to sit and enjoy the sunshine and completely relax, which I did for much of the day.
Prins Eugins was also, an artist and, thus, the house is full of many of his own works, as well as those of many other Swedish and European artists. His paintings are okay, I guess. Nothing really special in my opinion. It seems like he was a better collector than he was an artist, in my view.
However I did like his taste in books, which I thought, reflected an obviously worldly man with broad interests.
He died without heir – yeah, you guessed right – and so now his house is a gallery/museum space with a couple of current exhibitions. One features a lot of 19th century Italian works which held little interest for me.
Waldemarsudde
Waldemarsudde
Lars Wallin at Waldemarsudde
I was more interested in the exhibition of works by Swedish designer, Lars Wallin. Not being much of a fashionista myself, I’d never heard of Lars Wallin until I walked into the exhibition.
I discovered, quickly, however, I was VERY familiar with a lot of his work, as he has designed stage costumes for some very well known Swedish pop stars, including Nanne Grönvall and Peter Jöback. It was fascinating to see so many of the costumes up close.
And although dresses aren’t really “my thing” I was completely taken by the beauty of some of his work. There’s a series of red dresses, in particular, which I thought were just amazing.
Overall, a really great space, and a great way to spend a lovely sunny day in Stockholm.
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I have a half formed theory that gay men from the country, such as you and I, settle into gay inner city areas and stay. Our area, that is where we live and the adjacent suburbs, becomes our country town as we knew it.
That’s a pretty good theory Andrew. I tend to live in a reasonably small area, and the only major trips I make – aside from Sweden – is to country towns. I’m not all that interested in suburbia, just the bits closeby and the country. And yes, I know all of the people from my local shops, so it’s kinda like living in a small town in lots of ways.
I have a half formed theory that gay men from the country, such as you and I, settle into gay inner city areas and stay. Our area, that is where we live and the adjacent suburbs, becomes our country town as we knew it.
That’s a pretty good theory Andrew. I tend to live in a reasonably small area, and the only major trips I make – aside from Sweden – is to country towns. I’m not all that interested in suburbia, just the bits closeby and the country. And yes, I know all of the people from my local shops, so it’s kinda like living in a small town in lots of ways.
What’s wrong with show tunes!
(Asks I, who has just returned from a Rodgers and Hammerstein concert.)